Archive | November 2013

Restraining Myself

streetlight-raining
restraining myself
from calling you,
restraining myself
from wanting you,
love is a fool’s game and
now it’s your move,
restraining myself
from breaking the rules
and making a fool of
myself,
waiting in isolation,
desolation,
desperation,
staring into the empty
beer glass,
it’s raining outside,
the condensation drips
slowly down my side of the
window,
I wipe away the cold steam
on the glass,
a dim streetlight beams onto
the wet concrete curb
outside,
an orange glow on the
grey stone in the
black night,
I try telling myself that
I don’t love you but the
feeling is still there like
the sullen clouds
blanketing the city
being dragged across the
lands by the cold and
raging winds
as I refill the empty glass
with fresh beer from a
steel can that opens with
the sound of a beautiful
thin metallic click and
the seductive hissing of
gas like the sound of
your gentle breath
in pleasure
in submission
as I push my love inside
you,
the glass fills with a pale
and fizzing froth on top
and tiny little bubbles sink
down to the bed of their
sea
and bounce back up to their
heaven
and my dreamy thoughts of
you
escape nothing
as the rooftops all across the
city cannot escape the falling
rain.

– Lennie Bezwik

Workplace Meetings

overview-effect
Workplace meetings where
serious faces exchange trivial
ideas and formal language is
shat from the mouths of
robots as I sit in silence and
wonder
am I the only one who sees
the absurdity of devoting one’s
time and energy to the
merest most minuscule matters
of our everyday reality?
Straight faces talk about
potential improvements and
broken coffee machines and
computer disc space and
paper supplies as the big blue
planet keeps on spinning around
the sun
somewhere in infinite space
and the relentless march of time
pulls all of us closer to our
deaths
and nobody stops to interrupt the
meeting and say
“who gives a shit?”
our lives are expiring on this
planet in our universe whose
origins are unknown so
let’s not get too worked up about
work,
have a beer,
have sex,
have a pair of balls,
have a voice,
look towards the stars instead of
bickering over specs of dust,
don’t worry too much about
anything,
every fool is on this ball together
spinning deep within the ocean of
eternal darkness inhabited by
scattered starlight.
Meanwhile,
photocopying documents is
discussed for forty-five minutes,
I think nothing,
feel nothing,
say nothing,
contribute nothing,
my mind emigrates from the
hopelessness that swarms inside
the borders of these four walls,
the mind wants
to dream,
the mind wants
to hope,
the mind wants
to love.

– Lennie Bezwik

So Prince William Sang A Song

prince_william_singing
So Prince William
sang a song.
The only way I’ll
ever think he’s cool is
if he gives up his royal title,
donates his royal residences
to the homeless,
gets an asbo for
smashing up his Nan’s palace,
swaps caviar and corgis for
pork scratchings and a pit-bull,
does a collaboration album with
Morrissey and renounces his
family’s elitism.
Try harder Will,
you ain’t fooling me.

– Lennie Bezwik

The Rain

rainy_window
The rain
keeps me stuck
inside the flat,
thinking of
unrequited love,
thinking of
lonely death,
thinking of
scattered friends
and wallowing beside
a glass of beer and
an orange peel.
when the rain
stops falling,
I’ll be back outside
in the misty air
where I can roll on
to the bars and drink
the devil’s grape juice.

– Lennie Bezwik

Waterfalls in Paradise

waterfall-background
Last night I
dreamt of waterfalls
with all my
distant friends,
we swam in
rivers of purity
until our
souls were cleansed,

last night I
dreamt of waterfalls
and swam
towards the rocks,
if only
such a paradise
would defy
the turning clocks.

– Lennie Bezwik

Half Arsed Atman

Drunk on the moon
Take me
to the moon,
make me
complete,
give me
the atman
salvation
I need.

– Lennie Bezwik

Two Rounds

you-got-drunk
I start the early round
around about three o’clock,
a couple of wines
followed by beers

and when it gets to seven
I stop for dinner
and a soft drink will do –
my break.

I start the second round
around about ten o’clock,
a couple of wines
followed by beers

I enter the night,
the time I shine most,
the fairies are asleep,
the gargoyles are out,

the nutters and crackheads
and killers are out,
the dancers and drunkards
and hookers are out,

the bats are out,
the police are out,
the moon is alive,
the stars are watching.

– Lennie Bezwik

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